God sure has blessed me with a great set of friends. One of my very best friends is heading to Honduras this Saturday for her spring break.
Not the typical college spring break huh?
She is heading to Honduras with T Bar M and gets the opportunity to minister and train the people for a camp they have planted.
I know Erinn doesn't like people to "talk her up" or anything of the sort, but this girl is on fire for the Lord. She is a walking and talking example of a follower Christ. I know that God has big things planned for her not only in Honduras, but when she gets back as well. I know that she is going to be a light to every person she comes in contact with over the break. I can't wait to see the outcome of her ministry and what God will do through her!
So I hope that you will join me in prayer for her and the people in Honduras over these next few days.
Matthew 28:19
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Monday, February 14, 2011
Overjoyed. Overwhelmed. Unworthy.
Well the day has come. I have raised enough money to buy my flight to Africa.
Wait. What?!
I really just bought a flight to Africa. For three months. This is really happening...
Overjoyed and overwhelmed are two words that describe what I am feeling right now. I have been waiting for this day for what seems like forever, and it is finally here! My heart could burst with excitement, but what I didn't expect was to feel a sudden sense of inadequacy.
There isn't a doubt in my mind that Africa is where I am supposed to be, but this feeling in the back of my mind is I am so unworthy of this task.
I am unworthy of a lot of things. Aren't we all! But God has laid this opportunity in my lap and everything is falling into place as it should. So why am I feeling so inadequate?
I was at a retreat listening to a girl speak. She said something that at the time didn't really sink in. Until right about... now. It was something along the lines of feeling inadequate should be a very humbling feeling. Never be ashamed of feeling inadequate. That was a really encouraging thing to hear. Having this feeling certainly kicks us off any pedestal we might think we are on.
Let me tell you its a long way from the top!
I have three months for God to prepare my heart for this summer. And that is my prayer that God break me and break my heart.
Africa 2011.
Wait. What?!
I really just bought a flight to Africa. For three months. This is really happening...
Overjoyed and overwhelmed are two words that describe what I am feeling right now. I have been waiting for this day for what seems like forever, and it is finally here! My heart could burst with excitement, but what I didn't expect was to feel a sudden sense of inadequacy.
There isn't a doubt in my mind that Africa is where I am supposed to be, but this feeling in the back of my mind is I am so unworthy of this task.
I am unworthy of a lot of things. Aren't we all! But God has laid this opportunity in my lap and everything is falling into place as it should. So why am I feeling so inadequate?
I was at a retreat listening to a girl speak. She said something that at the time didn't really sink in. Until right about... now. It was something along the lines of feeling inadequate should be a very humbling feeling. Never be ashamed of feeling inadequate. That was a really encouraging thing to hear. Having this feeling certainly kicks us off any pedestal we might think we are on.
Let me tell you its a long way from the top!
I have three months for God to prepare my heart for this summer. And that is my prayer that God break me and break my heart.
Africa 2011.
Monday, January 24, 2011
When insomnia hits God speaks
I want this blog to be a place where I can be honest. A place of vulnerability. I was reading a friends blog earlier and there was a section that really hit me. Hit me like a freight train really.
"So why am I not as obsessed with him as he is with me?"
I don't even know how to begin to answer that question.
I have a relationship with God and I am in love with him, but It's that word OBSESSED. I want it. I want to be so overly obsessed with Jesus that people can see it on my face and in my actions. I want it to be so overflowing that only God can receive the glory for it. But that is the struggle. Making sure the glory is His. I can't tell you how many times it creeps in my mind "I wonder if anyone saw me help this person out." Human nature and Satan just suck. Yes, I did just say that.
We were not created to live these comfortable suburban lifestyles. We were created for His
glory and His alone. Created to use every breath we breathe to worship and serve a glorious God. Honestly, some days I sit here and wonder what and who I am living for. I know I am not using every breath God is granting me to give Him praise. This almighty, all powerful, creator of all things, and just plain awesome God is worthy of every second of everyday of our lives. And I don't give it to Him. I go about my days pretty much thinking of everything except how great God is.
I need to be broken.
I thank God for his unending mercy and grace, because I know what I deserve.
I hope Erinn doesn't mind me quoting from her blog, but this girl has a gift! God is evident in her writing and here is a link to her blog that she just started!
http://gloriouspursuits.blogspot.com/
Thursday, January 6, 2011
What is on my heart
Let me start this blog of by saying I am not the most eloquent writer. Like for instance I just looked up the word eloquent to see if I was using it correctly. This blog is mainly for my family, church family, and friends to keep up with me while I am in Jinja, Uganda this summer. I figured I would go ahead and practice my blogging skills and get into the habit of actually posting things. So the posts up until my trip will more than likely be about how God is preparing my heart for this trip.
To be honest with you I never thought I would go to Africa. I have two older sisters, and one of which has a heart for Africa. She has been twice. So my mindset was that was her place of ministry, and that I didn't need to go there. I was convinced I was supposed to be in South America or Asia. To be even more honest I was scared of Africa. I don't really know why I was scared, but I was. It's funny how God works. He takes you out of your comfort zones and puts you in places you would never think of going. I wrestled with God about Africa for a couple of weeks, but in the end we all know who was going to win that match. I struggled with the thought that I was going for the wrong reasons, but soon came to realize that was satan messing with my head. I know that going to Africa seems like the "trendy" thing to do, but like I said earlier I had no intention of going. Now I can't see myself anywhere but Africa. I'm not sure if this sounds crazy to people or not, but even though I haven't been to Africa yet those people hold my heart.
I go to sleep at night replaying the images of precious kids I have seen in someone's Facebook album or hearing stories from my sister. A more sobering thought that crosses my mind a few times a day is the number 147. 147 MILLION to be exact. That is the current number of orphans in the world. Wow. Really? That many... I can't even wrap my head around that. I get a lump in my throat and my heart breaks when I hear that. 43.4 million orphans are in Sub-Saharan Africa and Uganda is home to many infected with HIV/AIDS. "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27. How can we not help these people? I am so guilty of just passing people by these days, but I pray everyday for God to break me of that. We treat people so differently based on a lot of things. Financial status being one of them. In America we are so abundantly blessed while people all over the world live on $1 a day. We have so much that we are able to work with. I think it's time we start using our blessings to make the name of Jesus known and love like He loves us.
To be honest with you I never thought I would go to Africa. I have two older sisters, and one of which has a heart for Africa. She has been twice. So my mindset was that was her place of ministry, and that I didn't need to go there. I was convinced I was supposed to be in South America or Asia. To be even more honest I was scared of Africa. I don't really know why I was scared, but I was. It's funny how God works. He takes you out of your comfort zones and puts you in places you would never think of going. I wrestled with God about Africa for a couple of weeks, but in the end we all know who was going to win that match. I struggled with the thought that I was going for the wrong reasons, but soon came to realize that was satan messing with my head. I know that going to Africa seems like the "trendy" thing to do, but like I said earlier I had no intention of going. Now I can't see myself anywhere but Africa. I'm not sure if this sounds crazy to people or not, but even though I haven't been to Africa yet those people hold my heart.
I go to sleep at night replaying the images of precious kids I have seen in someone's Facebook album or hearing stories from my sister. A more sobering thought that crosses my mind a few times a day is the number 147. 147 MILLION to be exact. That is the current number of orphans in the world. Wow. Really? That many... I can't even wrap my head around that. I get a lump in my throat and my heart breaks when I hear that. 43.4 million orphans are in Sub-Saharan Africa and Uganda is home to many infected with HIV/AIDS. "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world." James 1:27. How can we not help these people? I am so guilty of just passing people by these days, but I pray everyday for God to break me of that. We treat people so differently based on a lot of things. Financial status being one of them. In America we are so abundantly blessed while people all over the world live on $1 a day. We have so much that we are able to work with. I think it's time we start using our blessings to make the name of Jesus known and love like He loves us.
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